There is a harsh reality in relationships that people don’t want to admit. This applies whether you are swingers, or polyamorous, or in relationship anarchy, or in a traditionally monogamous relationship.  Your partner (or spouse or whatever term you prefer) is free to make the choice to leave you behind at any moment of any day, for whatever reason they choose. Now, if you are inclined to worry, this may sound like the sword of Damocles hanging over your head, let me encourage you to think of it in another way.


Your partner has chosen to stay.


Perhaps things have been blissfully wonderful lately, and your partner chose to stay. Perhaps things haven’t been so easy… perhaps you have even been in a state of conflict, but they chose to stay. You told them that you were falling in love with your latest crush, and they chose to stay. They told you that their new friend is becoming very special to them, but they chose to stay.

Yesterday, they chose to stay.

This morning, they chose to stay.

Tomorrow,  they are likely to choose to stay.

Give them the benefit of the doubt that, whatever that thing is that you are worried about could happen, and they would still choose to stay.

Now isn’t that a better place on which to build a relationship than some arbitrary set of artificial rules and restrictions?

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