Archive for the Fidelity Category

July 12, 2016 / Communication, Fidelity, Lisa, physical intimacy

I Didn’t See It. Consent Violations for the Knowledgeable.

In my circle of friends, the issue of consent is discussed a lot. It is hashed and rehashed until we think we have it all down and we know what a consent violation looks like and what our response

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July 4, 2016 / Fidelity, non-monogamy, Polyamory, Relationship dynamics

Conditional Consent – aka “the Veto”

Over the years I have helped one friend after another deal with the aftermath of being devastated by the concept of consent, with a series of conditions, that some call “the Veto.” Partner ‘A

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June 21, 2016 / Fidelity, Relationship dynamics

Risk

There is a harsh reality in relationships that people don’t want to admit. This applies whether you are swingers, or polyamorous, or in relationship anarchy, or in a traditionally monogamous relatio

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June 16, 2016 / Fidelity, non-monogamy, Polyamory, Relationship dynamics

What does that mean?

What do I mean when I say I am polyamorous? Polyamory - [from the LT.Us glossary] The word polyamory comes from Greek  [poly, meaning many or several] and Latin amor. [love] We will use “polyam

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June 1, 2016 / Fidelity, Relationship dynamics

Rule 12: Never date a co-worker

Somewhere on social media I recently read about a poly person who was attracted to his wife’s co-worker. He asked if this rule applied. I learned the basic lesson decades ago - dating a co-worker is

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May 15, 2016 / Communication, Fidelity, Intimacy, non-monogamy, relationship structures

PolyAnna’s Musings: Relationships as group projects

Sometimes people seem to think that relationships, because they involve sex or love or both are some kind of a special snowflake. That they require some magic sauce. That they are mysteriously going t

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June 21, 2014 / Fidelity, non-monogamy, Polyamory, Relationship dynamics

A random moment from my life

It hit me today, one more time, just how very poly I am, and how much that shapes my life into something very different from the Midwestern norm. A girlfriend of mine, who also happens to be my win

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April 11, 2014 / Communication, Fidelity, non-monogamy, Polyamory, Relationship dynamics

Endings

Breakups suck. They really do. Sometimes phenomenal, long term, stable relationships find themselves at a sudden ending. Even when the people involved love each other, and there is no grand drama that

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September 13, 2013 / Chosen family, emotional intimacy, Fidelity, Intimacy, non-monogamy, physical intimacy, Polyamory, Relationship dynamics, relationship structures

Ask Polyana: Do Swingers move to Poly or do Polys more often move to Swinging?

Question: Do Swingers more often move on to Poly or do Poly people more often become Swingers? Answer: I have no idea... Really I don't. I think it is easier to let people self identify and then as

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April 13, 2013 / Communication, emotional intimacy, Fidelity, Intimacy, non-monogamy, physical intimacy, Relationship dynamics

PolyAnna’s Musings: Open Book or Blaring Radio

At our local poly meeting we discussed a new topic for us : Relationship Agreements - Discussions for solid foundations. (Spiffy title, right? One of the group leaders is a writer, so you know ;) )

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